Domestic
by Aktress
Summary: Loki needs a place to hide out on Midgard. Darcy's got a free room and connections to S.H.I.E.L.D. Naturally, where else should he chose to settle? TaserTricks drabble focusing on the humorous adventures and relationship between Loki and Darcy that seems strangely domestic.


**Domestic**

**A TaserTricks Drabble**

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_**Nutella**_

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Cooking was never Darcy's forte. Cooking for a god was even less of a success for the young woman. Mister High-and-Mighty Asgardian god was extremely picky, to top everything off. Loki was a lot harder to satisfy than his older brother, who could be entertained by a pile of pancakes and about 15 mugs of coffee. Loki, however, had rejected every single food she'd given him so far. Darcy had huffed and told him if earth food was so bad, to try and make it himself. She'd taken away that right when she caught him trying to make popcorn in the toaster and nearly blew the machine up.

Whether he was deliberately trying to make her slowly lose her mind or not, she was losing patience with the man who had pickier taste than a French chef.

Being assistant to a genius astronomy nut and being house buddies with Thor was one thing, but being S.H.I.E.L.D.'s least talented member who was hiding Loki in her house was another. She appreciated the new apartment S.H.I.E.L.D had offered to keep her mouth shut about all the top secret government crap. However, hiding the mastermind criminal that caused half of the top secret government crap to happen was probably pretty high on the No-No list.

Darcy had, of course, but shocked and reluctant to let Loki stay in her apartment at first. The first time he'd materialized in her front room, she started throwing potted plants at him. He'd just turned them into thin air before they hit him. Naturally, her response was throw the lamp too. Once she'd calmed down, he demanded she lent her apartment to him. He had to know what his brother and his team of caped crusaders in tights were doing, and the easiest solution was boarding with her. The only way he'd won her over was by agreeing to her terms of somehow adding zeros to the end of her balance on iTunes. He wasn't quite sure why she was so happy to see a few meaningless zeros tacked onto the end of her currency, but she was overjoyed and allowed him to stay.

Darcy hadn't quite thought through the fact that she was allowing an outlawed god become her roommate. She'd just been happy that she could go on an iTunes shopping spree whenever she wanted. Not even every album of Bon Jovi, Frank Sinatra, Journey, and a few others could've prepared her for this. Remembering that he was just in the room across from her own, sleeping while she stayed up late watching Netflix on iPod until three in her jammies was slightly unsettling. It seemed somewhat unfitting.

Already he was more finicky than her old cat. She'd already accidentally called him Fluffers twice. He had more mood swings than a PMSing teenage girl who had recently broken up with her boyfriend. One minute he was more curious than a five year old, constantly asking about the electronics or about a movie she was watching or about the 'disgustingly simple' clothing she chose to wear, and the next he had locked himself in his room to lurk and hate the world. Darcy felt more sympathy for her mother who had to deal with her teenage self than ever before.

So... cooking. Darcy was certainly not the most talented chef. She was lucky if she didn't set fire to her ice cream sundaes. Making meals to the guy who expected a five-star, multi-course meal three times a day was taking a toll on her. She was considering just asking for a few thousand bucks so she could buy out a local sit-down restaurant for him when she discovered his one weakness.

The Saturday had begun like normal. As normal as her Saturdays could be, anyways. Waking up half past eleven, flopping into the shower and throwing on a pair of clothes before making sure the house hadn't been set on fire. But when Darcy made her way out into the living room, she was shocked to see Loki wasn't hanging from the ceiling or making snakes appear on her couch. He was sitting down at the table with all four legs of his chair on the floor, and a guilty look on his face. He looked like a child that had been caught taking the last cookie from the jar. Except for the jar was smaller. And plastic. And filled with Nutella.

Darcy couldn't hold back a grin as she crossed her arms. In a flash, Loki had pushed the jar to the end of the table and was wiping his finger on the tablecloth. "What are you doing?" she asked in a teasing voice.

"Ah, Darcy. You're awake," he said with a nonchalant tone in his voice. "I was thinking you could prepare something to eat. Something suitable to put in my mouth, this time."

"Looks like you found something suitable before I woke up," she said, gesturing to the Nutella jar that was half empty.

"Oh, that," he said dismissively. "Merely a sugary treat. Nothing compared to the great deserts we have on Asgard."

"You like Nutella, don't you?" Darcy grinned.

He frowned, but Darcy could see right through him. "No." That was one lie she could never believe. No one just didn't like Nutella.

"Fine, then you wouldn't mind if I tossed it out," Darcy said, grabbing the jar tauntingly and holding it above the garbage can. A look of panic crossed the man's face and Darcy was delighted with this.

"No!" he called, arm outstretched in an melodramatic gesture that belonged onstage. "Ah, no use putting it to waste. Perhaps someday my tastebuds will be acquired to your food. It's doing no good to throw it out."

"Oh, your tastebuds will acquire it _someday?_" she teased, setting it on the counter instead.

"Yes," he said, his eyes shifting to the jar again.

Darcy decided that he had caused her enough trouble with all his finicky eating that it was time to have some fun of her own. "Well, then I'll just store this away in a _super secret_ place until you beg me for it again." Darcy bit her lip to keep back a smile as she grabbed the jar and began heading down the hall. The horrified look returned to his face, and Darcy let her smile win her over. She began running down the hall and entered her room, tossing it into her makeup purse before Loki could come to rescue his precious Nutella.

When she walked back to her doorway, Loki had followed her down the hall and was furiously peering into her room. Darcy smirked. "What, you don't want the Nutella, do you?"

"No," he snapped. "I just..." he frowned and stormed back off into the kitchen. Darcy let loose a little chuckle before she retreated back into her room and closed the door, hopping atop her bed and grabbing her iPod to read a book on.

Not even two minutes into reading the book, Darcy's door swung open to reveal a defeated looking Loki. Darcy smirked. "Can I help you?"

Loki grimaced. "Where's the Nutella?"

"I'm sorry, did you just ask where the Nutella is?" Darcy chimed.

He narrowed his eyes and spoke through gritted teeth. "Don't make me force it from you."

"Ask nicely," she grinned. He only grimaced back.

"Please, Miss Lewis. Where is the Nutella?"

"You can't be saying you _like _it, can you?"

"It's the most delicious thing I've tasted in all the nine realms," Loki blurted. "There, is that enough for you?"

Darcy grinned even brighter. "It's in my makeup bag," she laughed. "Knew I'd find something you'd like."

"It's only one thing," Loki said, nearly ripping the purse open to get to his beloved Nutella.

"Don't feel bad, dude," Darcy said as his eyes sparkled upon sighting the brown and white container. "Nutella's the stuff of the gods."

"I must find out what kind of magic has bewitched this spread," Loki said, looking with a pondering glance at the jar. "I enjoy this food very much."

With that, he left the room and Darcy rolled her eyes, loving the fact that even Loki couldn't resist Nutella.

She wasn't all that pleased with the fact that he'd cleaned out her stash of Nutella jars in the next hour. "Well, looks like we're buying Costco size," Darcy grumbled as he nearly begged her with puppy dog eyes to go buy more. "You've got the appetite of a horse."

"Funny story..." Loki muttered under his breath.

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**_Somehow, I thought the idea to start a little drabble fic was a good idea. Hopefully it doesn't turn out to be a big flop. Anyways, hopefully more to come soon, and hopefully focusing more on Loki/Darcy than Loki/Nutella._**

**_Also, to boost my ideas and get more chapters out, I'll take requests if you have 'em. You'll be credited, of course. And have the honor of knowing you inspired a selection. ;)_**

**_Cheers! -Aktress_**


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